The End is in Sight!

In just a couple of weeks, I will complete a long time goal of mine. I will graduate from college with a Bachelors Degree. At 54, it is fairly uncommon to see other students my age at the university that I attend. So many people I know did not attend college for various reasons and I am happy if they are complete without this achievement. I had not given it too much thought after starting my business over 16 years ago but once all five of my children had attended and graduated from college, I had to rethink my life’s goal. I’ve mentioned this before but with the commencement date approaching, I am growing nervous of what lies ahead.

My life is so different than I had planned it to be at this age. I am taking care of my grandson and work  at my business but I have not expanded much beyond that because of the time constrictions with school and work. Now that the calendar will be wide open, what should I do?  I have focused so much on graduating (possibly cum laude) that I haven’t given much thought past that day. My professors certainly have done their best at preparing us for life after college so to speak, but mostly they were speaking to my much younger classmates who have their whole lives in front of them. I’m on the downhill road at this point and I don’t mean that in a negative way. I’m just being a realist. I would love to move to the mountains, keep working at my business and travel a bit but that is not happening in the near future due to other responsibilities. I wonder sometimes if its to late to have such wishes but without wishes and dreams, where would we be?

Now that the end, as in college, is so near, I’ll have to switch gears once again and find my place in this world. I hope I can find it soon!

Regrets? Of course!

While many of my classmates look forward to the coming weeks, commencement ceremonies and parties, I am not able to focus on those types of things. Its a trade off  when you get a degree at my age. You already have responsibilities, a job, children, life experience and the such. My classmates have an open slate before them. My slate has been written on and there is not very much space left. The bad thing about that slate is that you cannot erase any of it. It is permanent, forever, unchangeable. Therefore, I would like to say to my fellow classmates and friends alike “You can never change the past, so make sure your future is worth remembering!”

To say I wouldn’t change some things in my past would be telling tales. I hear people say they have no regrets but I am not one of them. Of course, I have regrets and I find it hard to believe anyone can get through their life without some. In fact, I could not list all of my regrets in this blog. However, since I realize that regrets don’t change a thing, I choose to move forward and I plan to make my remaining time on the Earth something I want to do and who I want to be. You should do the same!

Can Time be Stretched?

Hello again. It is a beautiful day in Orlando and I have a new charge in my life. My 9 year old grandson has come to live with me. He needed a change of scenery and I volunteered to help make that happen. The decision was made while I was visiting Texas during Spring Break. I knew there was a possibility that he would return to Florida with me but I was not 100% sure until I purchased his plane ticket on Saturday, the day before we left.

Before his arrival, I really did not feel I had any extra time. Between a full time job and a full time load of classes (5 courses) at UCF, I was already unable to find time for visiting with friends, reading, movies or anything extracurricular. Nose in the books at work and at school had me stumped for finding more time.  Well, by throwing a precocious, hyperactive, nine year old into that schedule, I now realize I had much more time than I imagined!

My grandson could be considered high maintenance and such a large life change has not been an easy one for him. How could it be? He is only nine and left behind everything he has really ever known. Although, family is only a phone call away, it is still a major transition for him and for me. We are working through it together. The week I went to Texas, he was on Spring Break, now Orlando schools are on Spring Break so we have had quite a bit of time together. I think we will both be glad when he returns to school and I return to less eventful week days.

Up, Up and Away

Today I have been thinking about how far I have come in my life. Being born and raised in rural Pennsylvania did not provide much social or cultural exposure. Of course, when I was young, I accepted my life for what it was and didn’t realize there were other cultures, places or people outside the small circle I lived in. I was aware of these things but they had nothing to do with me.

As I got older, I realized there was so much world out there that I would never be able to see or experience it all. That is a sad prospect but looking at the “cup half full” view, that means I should not have any trouble seeing and experiencing new things until the day I die. I did what I had set out to do as a young woman and that was to raise my children to the best of my ability and make sure they all received a college degree of some sort or the other.

When that was done, I was a bit lost in life. If you had asked me five years ago, “what do you want to do with the rest of your life?” I would not have had an answer other than “I don’t know”.  I am happy to say that today, I can answer that question. I want to keep learning, seeing, and experiencing everything I can, while I can and as soon as I can!  College has given me the confidence to take charge and get my life in order. I feel like I am living in an upward trajectory as I get ready to graduate and on the final day when I cross the stage to receive my diploma, I will be well on my way to not only a new life, but a better one. So, I am going up, up and away!